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In the week since I’ve posted, I have talked to the supervisor about my position being more demanding than the others.   She has an open door policy, but next time I will make sure the Assistant Supervisor, Becky is not around.

I told her that my position required more responsibility and should pay more money.  I made the mistake of saying that I worked harder than the other girls who were getting the same pay as me.

“How do you know you work harder than the other girls?” Becky asked angrily.

“That position does require more responsibility,” Pat said saving me.  “It was once called the Assistant Manager position and paid a little more, but somehow that fell by the wayside.”  She added.

I asked her to go to bat for me again and at least get me the title even if our poor school district could not afford to pay me more.  I don’t know how that has gone, but I did notice the superintendent was in our kitchen today snooping around.  Could it be he was watching me work?  Today would have been a good day.  I was very busy.

I really love the blossoming co-worker relationship Maria and I are experiencing.  We have really worked well together and she complimented me in saying I help her a lot.

We hired Tina’s niece, Connie, and she is experienced.  This week has been pretty easy.  Everyone pulls their weight and we all get along so beautifully.  They continue to speak Spanish at me, and I just completed another lesson in Rosetta Stone.  I hope to begin some new phrases for them by the end of the week.

They all seem to get a really big kick out of my enunciation.  Today Maria was telling me to make extra cornbread to mix with the bread for stuffing.  She did not know the English word for mixing.  I told her to tell me the Spanish version and we would  use that.  I will have to get her to repeat it to me several more times before I can even look up the proper spelling of the words.

Today is Tuesday.  Yesterday was my birthday.  Tina and Maria gave me a gift.  I was so touched that after knowing me such a short time, they would do that.

Vangie is not coming back.  She blew off the two-week notice.  She won’t even get a good reference.  Even though we are short one person, it seems to be going smoothly.

Tina dates the ex-husband of a former employee of mine.  He has a scoop on me that I hoped wouldn’t come to light in this workplace, but que sera sera.

She asked, “How long have you and your husband been married?”

“Fourteen years,” I say wondering how long it will take her to do the math on the children.

“Oh, I thought he was the father of your children,” she said.  Not even 60 seconds passed.

“I don’t have any children.”  I brace for the next all too familiar question.

“Why?  Is there something wrong with you?”

I am always surprised how women will blurt this out without a second thought as to my feelings.  I mean what would she have done if I had burst out crying and said, “I can’t have any kids!”  I think I will start practicing an award-winning performance such as this for the next time somebody asks me this.  Because I guarantee it will come up again.

So I reply, “No, it was a choice.”

“Why?” She says in utter disbelief.

“Because the only ‘choice’ I had was to be a single mom, and I did not want to raise a kid without a father and on welfare.”

I thought that might piss her off, because she has children and she raised them by herself.  I can almost bet if she is working in a high school cafeteria, she depended on welfare to help support them.  I’m not judging this woman, but she should not judge me for remaining childless either.

“It is hard to raise one alone, but what did you do get a hysterectomy?”

“No, I’ve been pregnant before.”

“What happened?”

“That didn’t work out either.”

Thank goodness the conversation ended there.  I think she finally got a grip that it was getting too personal.  I know life has taken me down a non-traditional path.  A path that few people understand.  Most women see me as very selfish and cold when they find out I’m childless.  A few see me as a very smart woman, but are sad for me just the same.

I maintain that sometimes I wish I had a child of my own, but the reasons are selfish.  I don’t want to be alone when I get old.  Having a child does not guarantee that.  I am pretty humble, but will say that because of my childlessness I have been a surrogate of sorts to many of my friends children who were being raised in a single-parent household.  There have been times when I have been very generous to my friends and strangers because I did not have a child to spend my money and time on.  I see where God used me in this capacity, and have read about several women in the Bible who did not bear children and their noble deeds.  I relate to them sometimes.

I was raised by my dad, and I guess the earth in my heart is a little stonier because of it.  My husband teaches auto mechanics at the local prison, and his class is full of 20-something fellas who were raised without a father.  I see every day where countless teenage girls go missing because they did not have a father or even one of their parents paying enough attention to them.

When I think on these things, I know I made the right decision.  I just always walk away from this conversation feeling drained.  I hate that she pities me.  I know she does not know what she would do without her kids.

Welp, I do.

It has been a very long week and I am glad tomorrow is Friday.  I was off last Friday and I came back to a lot of work on Monday.  Maria made my brownies and cookies while I prepared the apple cobbler and toast.

Tensions are high between Vangie, me, and Maria.  Apparently there have been lots of problems between Vangie and Maria lately.  One is that she talks back to her and speaks to her in a disrespectful manner.  Becky the supervisor has talked with her about this and her attitude.

Vangie told me later she did not believe she was being disrespectful to Maria and that she didn’t have to take this sh** anymore and was saying this while she was going through the kitchen and retrieving all her things such as coffee cups, aprons, and things she has brought in through the years.

Today the supervisor, Becky, told us she gave her notice. Later in the day Vangie told me she did not believe she would be back on Monday.  Oh, boy, we are gonna be short-handed again, and I must say I do not look forward to that.

I noticed when she came back from her surgery after a six-week absence, that she was a bit uneasy with how Becky, Maria, and I worked so closely together.  Maria and Becky incorporate my help with many issues in the kitchen.

Maria talked with me this morning and  said, “I don’t know why I’m having all these problems with her now.  I have worked with her so many years.”

Vangie was next in line for a promotion, and I believe she felt as though she was getting passed over and became less confident in her position.  This may have begun a chain reaction of events which led to her reprimand and ultimate resignation.

I was feeling bad about this today and talked with her and told her maybe she should think about it before she quits, at least until after Christmas.  She said, “But I already gave them my notice.”  I said, “Take it back.”  But she reiterated that her mind was made up.

Her stupid pride is hurt.  I know too well about pride.  It has cost me dearly over the years.  She could easily fix all this if she would swallow her pride.

But, after all that, I clocked out and told everybody adios for the day.  She had already incorporated me to clean out her sinks, and I’ll be a sucker if she didn’t ask me to carry out her trash as well after I had clocked out.

I told her, “I’m already clocked out, Vangie, and I’m going home.”  This is a problem, too.  She tries to use me, Tina, and poor simple Michael the maintenance man, to do all her sh** work.  Maybe it is best if she leaves after all.  I will say nothing more to her about it.

Maria suggested to Becky that she has a friend who might come to work for us.  She, too, is from Old Mexico, and I would really look forward to working with another native of Mexico.

This will be a short week.  I’m off on Friday. Yeah.  The job is getting easier, and today when I got home I did not feel so dead dog tired.

I had a garage sale over the weekend and Vangie came to the sale.  I have felt tension between us since last week when the money went missing out of the till and Maria thought she took it.  I maintained that with five different people in and out of the huge cooler where we keep it, that we could not be sure who took the money.  We have a locked bank bag now.  It is a hassle to load all that change into little baggies, because I do not have time to sort it before lunch.

The main issue I had with Vangie is that she gives me extra duties like she is my supervisor.  I looked at the chart on the wall discussing what each person’s duties for the day entailed.  I did not see who was responsible for taking out the four 55 gallon drum trashes, or compress and throw out all the boxes from the truck delivery and daily use.  I did see where Vangie is responsible for filling the ice glasses at lunch time – - a duty I usually perform.

I asked Maria about the trash and she told me it was Vangie and Tina’s responsibility.  I have not filled the ice glasses or taken out the trashes since last week.  In the beginning Vangie “helped” me to understand my duties as Maria was learning her managerial position and did not speak English very well.  I was led to believe that the trashes and boxes were everyone’s responsiblity when they had time.  I seemed to be the only one that ever had the time, and it was really wearing me down.

Up until Thursday of last week I have kept my nose to the grindstone and worked the whole day without a break or anything.  We were short-handed and I knew these duties had to be done.  They are the worst and most physically demanding duties of this job.  Especially if you have to put away the truck delivery.  I was doing this as well.  I noticed Tina and Vangie always had time to stand and talk, and at 1:30 the only work left was putting away the dishes.  A task that would leave them with about 25 minutes of free time, as they leave at 2 p.m.  Tina has always been appreciative.  She has had difficulty keeping up.  I can imagine she is tired from working two jobs.

I noticed one of the maintenance guys taking the trash out today.  He is simple, and Vangie is very pretty.  As my husband says, “Just the thought of it is good enough for most men.”  I suspect Vangie has used her looks throughout life to get her way.

I hope this tension between us coupled with the fact that Maria and I have become closer will not cause me problems down the road.  Time will tell.

It is interesting to note that in my endeavor to better understand Hispanics and getting along with them, that my issue with Vangie has nothing to do with race.  It is a beautiful people thing.

I never knew a person who had the perfect body, hair, teeth, face, and charisma (a.k.a. beautiful people) that did not use these traits to get their way.

I had to tell Maria my cash drawer was missing 4 five dollar bills today.  We keep it in the big walk-in cooler and at any given time, me, Tina, Vangie, Maria, and today delivery driver were all in there working with the door closed.

Right away Maria thought Vangie did it.  I said we could not be sure because of the above.  She said she noticed how she got red in the face and jumpy when I was going over the deposits with our boss Becky.

Now I have to put the money in a bank bag and “hide” it in the cooler.  What a drag.  I was uncomfortable all day at work.  I somehow messed up my rolls, and it was a very long day.  I am glad tomorrow is Friday.

I just know too well when something like this happens, and I tell, and they think I’m pointing fingers at them, then relationships get broken down and I start getting sh** at work.  I expressed my feelings to Maria and Becky about this.

Nonetheless, Becky wanted to go over the books in the middle of the kitchen so whoever did it would know they were caught.  Yeek.  Ugly day.

I also had to complain that since Vangie has been back, she has pulled me away from my station to help her with her work, and citing that Maria told her to tell me to help her.  Maria said it was not true and she would give me instructions on extra details.

I was frustrated with Vangie yesterday because she called me back after clocking out to help her carry boxes outside.  I had already emptied all the trashes, which is her job, and now she was incorporating me to do more of her work.

I had to get that straight with Maria today.  I have been busting my hump from the time I get there at 7:30 a.m. until 1:30 p.m with no breaks and very little time to even take a sip of water.  The only time I get to sit down during that time is when I go to the restroom, and that is usually once in that amount of time.

I should blame myself because I work until there is no more work to do, and Vangie and Tina have grown accustomed to that and let me do their work.  Welp, when I went home yesterday and could hardly move, I decided something had to give.  I kept noticing how they had plenty of time to lean on their counters and talk.  Meanwhile, my counter was covered up with work, and I barely had time to clean all my sinks and table before leaving.

Today was different.  Maria told me not to empty any more trashes or take out any more boxes, and apparently she had a talk with Vangie because she didn’t ask me for any help.  She did let me know she did some of my dishes, and I replied that I filled her ice cups for lunch.  Gosh, I hope this doesn’t turn out to be something she resents me for.

I had to quit my last job because of resentment and a very popular employee (like Vangie) who got the ass for me because she thought she had to do more work than me.  She ended up turning my supervisor against me and I began getting all the sh** work.

Time will tell.  It’s not like anyone is standing in line to get a job in this podunk town’s high school cafeteria.  Ha!

Ahhh, all four of us were at work this morning.  It has been almost two months since we had a full staff.  Tina and Vangie had a lot of catching up to do, so I stayed off in my little corner and made todays baker entrée, Apple Crisp.

I overheard that Tina and Vangie didn’t like each other as they were discussing hiring Tina a couple of months ago.  You couldn’t tell it today.  They seemed like old friends and I am very glad about that because I like both of them very well.

I feel much closer to Maria these days.  She has a great sense of humor, and helped me with the Apple Crisp recipe.

Vangie returned to work today, but Tina had a doctor’s appointment.  I will be so glad when I go to work and there is a full staff.  The only time I get to sit down on a day like that is when I go pee.  We just really have to hustle to get it all done, and by the end of my shift I am really tired.

This must be why this is a 6 hour job.  Most people wouldn’t last if it was eight hours straight of that mess.  Maybe tomorrow we will have a full staff.

It is really good to have Vangie back as the main entrée cook.  She is very fast and very good.